Nine weeks or maybe 8?

It is time to schedule my first prenatal appointment. I have my long term doctor and office that I love, Dr. Michael Maser from A New Beginning. Dr Maser has delivered all of my other kids and has always taken care of my health. In May I went to doctor Maser and told him Ron and I were ready to start a family and I wanted to be at my best health for this, so Dr Maser started me on prenatal vitamins and folic acid. I have always understood the importance of getting your body ready to carry a precious baby inside of you and nourish a life from the very start. Ron and myself were getting married June 7th and we wanted to start trying after our wedding reception in August, this gave me a few months head start of vitamins and supplements. I cut out pop, coffee, ate a healthy diet, and exercised in preparation. 

If you have been around me while I have been pregnant in the past you know I have a hard time. I throw up from week 8 until after I deliver the baby. I am put on Zofran an anti nausea medication that was created for cancer patients. I told Ronnie, and family about this before I was pregnant but I don’t think they understood until they were living with me. I was constantly hugging the toilet bowl, traveling with a zip lock bag, or sleeping with a bowl.  I don’t mind it’s who I am and I know what I get in the end, it is so worth it to me!

I head into the office with a box of cookies for the staff, I say Hi to Cindy at the desk and Dr Maser’s wife and I am so excited to be heading down this path again. Lisa, Dr Maser’s medical assistant calls be back and it is one of those time I don’t mind getting weighed. We sit down in a room together and she talks to me about the pregnancy and we share a smile over this. Dr Maser steps in and says in perfect form “you did it again” we both laugh. We go over my past medical history and I talk him into a quick ultrasound. Dr Maser walks me into the darkened room where they do ultrasounds, we will figure out my due date. Because of stress over the summer through early August I have not been regular so it is hard to say what my due date was.

I am wearing my suit for work, the room is dark, I pull up my blouse to expose my belly, the scan starts. A moment later there he is, a little baby with a beating heart! It is real I see him on the screen, I can’t tell yet my stomach is not bulging, I can not feel him, I have only just started to feel queasy. I immediately  feel the sting of tears that prick my eyes, I have the lump in my throat. I am in love instantly, I feel the hopes and dreams for the future, I see kids playing at the beach. Then I notice, Dr Maser is very quite then asks me when my last cycle was and when I got a positive pregnancy test. I am alarmed, I see a heart beat why are we asking these questions again? I tell him and he says the baby is measuring a little smaller than he should be, and sets my due date a week later from May 12th 2012 to May 19th 2012, he doesn’t seem overly concerned. I am instantly scared and I tell no one. I think to myself, I have big babies, not small and I know all the dates and times when I could have conceived (yes I do have a little type A personality in me). I already sense this will not be a normal pregnancy something in my soul is speaking to me, I try to push it away but it wont go, living down deep inside, I am scared! I pray dear God please let my baby be OK.

I step out of the office, and call Ron.

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Nine weeks or maybe 8?

  1. Sherrie Nunheimer

    Mothers intuition. It is a remarkable thing isn’t it? It seems even then God was preparing you for your precious baby Elijah and the struggles he and your family would face. Always remember Tera, a soul has to be born and die to be with God for eternity. As I am getting older, yes I admit I’m old, I realize how fast time goes. In the blink of an eye lives come and go. The important thing is where they go. Elijah is with God and he is well in heaven. That is really all we can all pray for. You WILL see him again. Keep writing and healing. Not only is this helping you but the rest of us too. I find myself thinking of you, your family and your precious baby a lot.
    Love you, Sherrie

  2. Sandee Kingsley

    I love reading your storie. It makes me cry every time I read them, because as a mom, all you pray for is to have a healthy child. Unfortunately as you know…..it doesn’t always happen-no matter how hard you pray. God puts everyone on this earth for a reason. I’m glad you started out with Dr Maser. He delivered all my kids too!

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